It’s actually Adult Geek Camp and not in the summer

I arrive in Montreal.

The cool, brisk air hits me as I disembark, and I sigh from relief. After five days in muggy Orlando, the autumn air is a relief.

I take the escalator down to immigration, and I am first in line at the new automated kiosks. After five minutes, I am done and on my way to baggage claim. Last time at this airport, it took an hour just to get through immigration. I’ve noticed this increased level of automation at several airports recently, including Heathrow just last week. It makes me happy.

I grab a cab to the nearby VIA rail station, where a group of us are meeting to travel together to camp. I enter the rail station waiting area and look around. I was hoping for a bar or restaurant. But the entire station is the size of a typical airport gate, and the only thing close to food and drink are a couple of pathetic vending machines with various flavors of potato chips, candy bars, and pop.

“Hey, are you with Bitnorth?” a man’s voice says to me, and I look up a bit surprised.

“Oh, yeah, I am,” I stutter in reply. “How did you know?”

“Uh, you look like a tech geek,” he says matter-of-factly.

“Right,” I say. I decide to take it as a complement.

We introduce ourselves. He is new to the group, but I trust the organizers believe he is “one of us.”

Appropriately, this tall, straight-postured man is complete with nerd glasses and a camo-green duffle bag.

Technology and curiosity bring us together

Within minutes, others join us in the waiting area, and hugs and reunions begin.

There is nothing obvious that ties us together physically, or so I think. Tall, short – long hair, buzz cuts – cargo shorts, jeans, and even heels. But perhaps there is an attitude. A calm confidence. A curiosity. A willingness to embrace strangers on this journey.

Soon, some 15 of us have gathered, arriving by plane, train or taxi, and we are ready to head to our destination – a camp in Mont Tremblant, Quebec, about 90 miles outside of Dorval, where the Montreal airport is located.

This will be a new location for Bitnorth, and a renewal of this once annual weekend event after a four-year hiatus. I have missed it. Perhaps more than I even know.

Bitnorth is an adult geek camp of sorts. It was founded several years ago by a man I met through the tech speaker circuit. Starting more than ten years ago, I would bump into a lot of the same people at cloud computing or tech conferences, where many of us would speak on panels together or recommend each other to the organizers. Events such as: Interop, Cloud Computing Expo, Strata, etc.

Bitnorth is an exclusive camp, I will admit. The organizers select campers based on a fairly strict set of criteria: smart, curious, open, fun, and willing to share ideas with others. And importantly, there is a ‘no asshole’ rule. Everyone at the camp shares some level of core values.

Bitnorth is my safe place. Where you can have intellectual debate and even disagreements without repercussions. Where you can cry, laugh, argue, or sit quietly and listen. Where you learn so much from the other attendees that your mind overflows, and yet, you are hungry for more.

Taking the party bus 

Yes, I admit, we also party. There is never a shortage of hard liquor, wine, beer, or cider. Perhaps other legal adult substances. And so much food. Healthy, for the most part, but also bags of chips, chocolate, marshmallows, gummy bears, and other munchies. Up to you what you want to eat or drink. There are few rules other than to be fully present and to share and learn.

Appropriately, this year we are taking a school bus to our special adult summer camp. Literally, a yellow school bus. We load onto the bus with bags of drinks and food for the road trip.

Within minutes of departing, I am popping Prosecco bottles and pouring bubbly into red plastic cups as we pass glasses, french baguettes, cheese and ham around the child-sized seats that our adult-sized legs are crammed into.

Conversations soon flow as easily as the wine and beer, and I can overview discussions of public cloud infrastructure, security governance, travel, golf, new jobs, writing, and, of course, politics. Waves of laughter echo through the bus.

These campers are my tribe

Even though I don’t know most of this year’s attendees, I am confident I will feel the same as in past years. These are my people. My tribe.

For much of my life, I’ve felt different. Not quite smart enough or popular or talented or pretty enough. The input has been consistent as well. Why am I so passionate? Why do I work so hard? Why do I love technology? Why do I snort when I laugh? Why do I ask so many questions? Why do I swear?

As a woman in the tech industry, I face consistent challenges of sexism and bias, both intentional and unintentional.

Fortunately, I have learned to love my quirks, snorting, and passion through conscious effort, good friends, and thousands of dollars in therapy. But even as I have gained acceptance of who I am, it is validating and energizing to spend a couple of days where I can truly be “me”.

We hail from different parts of North America and the world – Silicon Valley, Chicago, Seattle, Montreal, Toronto, London, Amsterdam, New Orleans, and others. We are forced to disconnect from our digital lives and spend 2 ½ days with many strangers in the Canadian countryside, where we share rooms and bathrooms, sleep in sleeping bags, roast marshmallows, and present to each other.

It makes me feel just like I did when I used to go to Girl Scout camp or horse camp, where I was surrounded by other kids who wanted to hike through the woods, ride horses, read Edgar Allan Poe in the dark, and eat too many marshmallows.

And just like Girl Scout camp, where we worked hard on our badges for knot tying, compass reading, and outdoor survival, Bitnorth also has a serious side.

Every camper shares a passionate topic

This adult summer camp is sort of TEDx meets Burning Man.

In fact, everyone at Bitnorth has to give a presentation or lead an activity on something they are passionate about. It specifically is not to be a topic related to our day jobs.

It’s Saturday morning. Sleepy, hungover campers are making their way to the kitchen. I went to bed early since I’m still fighting off a cold, so I am in better shape than most. However, to be truthful, I have never been good at staying up late and drinking. Even in college.

We all fill our mugs with strong coffee from one of the two huge urns on the counter, and start munching on bagels, oatmeal, and eggs. Small groups gather and chat at the various tables in the dining area over breakfast.

Soon, we are herded into the main room to begin presentations. There are some 50 to get through, and at an average of 10 to 15 minutes each, it’s going to be a packed day.

Before I know it, I am snorting and laughing at the first presenter, who opened the event with her presentation, titled, “Is my father in the mafia?”. She is better than most stand-up comedians with her self-effacing humor and comedic timing as she weaves her tale of growing up in an Italian family that, upon reflection, nearly matched every part of the Sopranos television series.

I present on how to write and speak to engage with your audience. Lessons I learned from my writing retreat. New content from my passion project – my book and this website.

The gap in our lives that adult camp fills

Throughout the course of the day, I learned not only about the mafia, but the story of growing up in pre-WWI Europe, how we solve the world’s wicked problems, how to play frisbee golf, how to build new communities, the art of touch improvisation, secrets of addiction, the science of taste, the business of sex, nature versus nurture, the Gerasimov Doctrine, the healing power of water, Burmese muslem refugees in Bangladesh, Amelia Earhart, and so much more.

Each topic and presenter showed his or her passion, and everyone listened, cheered, and validated.

As the early afternoon transitioned to evening, our cups filled with wine and beer instead of coffee, but no one stopped listening or engaging.

“Do you find it easy to have this kind of intellectual discussion outside of BitNorth,” one man asks while we stand around the kitchen sipping our drinks.

“No,” I say at once, in harmony with about five other people who all respond in kind.

“Why is that do you think?” he asks.

“I don’t know,” I respond. “But I only had this type of community when I lived in Taiwan. There was a group of expat friends from all over the world, and we could discuss anything. It didn’t matter what side you were on; it was more about learning from each other and trying to understand the world around us. I think in the tech industry, everyone is too busy trying to be the smartest person in the room or make someone else wrong.”

“We’ve become so divided that it’s dangerous to share your point of view,” suggests another camper.

This discussion spotlights the reason I need this camp and these people in my life. There is no other place like this. Intellectual yet fun.

Why we all need our own adult camp

It makes me wish we all had a camp with people that make us feel safe and who challenge us to be better people.

Why is camp just for kids? Adults also need time to make new friends, try new challenges, learn new things, and step away from day-to-day life. Not to mention sitting around a campfire and roasting marshmallows.

As I sit in the airport lounge ready to head to Boston and a week of meetings, I feel thankful.

Thankful for my health. Thankful for global entry and airport lounges. Thankful for good food and wine. Thankful for people who make me think about new ideas and perspectives. Thankful for a husband who told me, “you have to go to Bitnorth; it’s your happy place.”

But most of all, right now, I am thankful for my weekend at adult geek camp.